Monday, March 13, 2006
All you never knew.
I've had a rough go of it lately, trying to outdo my last post. Pressure! Then I got over it, and decided to rip off Damian and others by giving you a numbered list of things you don't know about me! Neat.
1. I prefer to brush my teeth in the shower.
2. My brother and I are very close. Most everyone has commented on it, I guess it's strange for siblings to get along so well. But, he's the one person who's seen me at my best, and at my worst and never judged me.
3. I laugh every time someone sneezes. Especially if it's the first time I've heard them sneeze.
4. I like sneezing myself. A lot. Sometimes I wish I did it more often. Once, I had a sneeze stuck, I couldn't sneeze it out. My brother suggested I snort some pepper. I did. And I sneezed and sneezed and we laughed like two idiots.
5. When I eat raisins or grapes, I usually tell someone, "You know, grapes (or raisins) are nature's candy?
6. I am hopelessly addicted to tattoos. I have one that needs to be finished, others to cover, and ideas for many more. But, I'm penniless right now. I have to get my fix by watching shows like Miami Ink, and Inked. Hearing the tattoo machines makes me twitchy. Sometimes, I go to the parlor, just so I can smell it, and hear the machines go.
7. I love the smell of used bookstores. First thing I do is walk inside, close my eyes and take a deep breath.
8. Ever since stumbling upon grouphug.us a couple years ago, I've been unable to share candy or chips from a communal bowl. Just watching people go nuts over a bowl of m&ms and stick their grubby mitts in there makes me shudder.
9. When I was a kid, I was terrified of the Yodeller on the Price is Right and of those aliens on Sesame Street.
10. When I was a kid, and I'd be scared to go to sleep, or wake up from a nightmare, I used to think about Strawberry Shortcake in the forest with her friends until I fell asleep again. I tried this the other day, and it still works!
11. After I watched the movie Kalifornia, I let myself just feel the wind, and I love it. When it's windy out, I'm the freakshow with my arms spread and my eyes closed and a shit-eating grin on my face.
12. I rescue most bugs and take them outside. Especially spiders. A centipede will have me standing on a chair, screaming like a madwoman.
13. Really, my main motivation in life is finding shit that makes me laugh. I laugh all the time. Pretty much any situation can be funny if you look at it right.
14. Trent Reznor is a genius, and he always knows just how to sing exactly what I'm feeling.
15. I've never been arrested or in any real trouble. Once, in middle school, I was hanging out with the bad kids and we got caught skipping. The 4 or 5 of us went to the principal's office. One by one, the kids in front of me were getting suspended. I was so nervously excited to get in trouble and be suspended. I was the last one, and they said they were going to let me off with a warning since I was such a good student otherwise. I was disappointed.
16. Sometimes, I wish I could be religious and believe in god. It seems like it makes life a lot easier.
17. I wanted to be a kleptomanic when I was a kid. I think I saw something on TV about it. Anyway, I'd steal stupid shit whenever we went to a store. Like, those little puffballs from craft stores and candy. I didn't really see the point, and I stopped.
18. I don't like chicken. I'm happy that I'm by myself now, and don't ever have to eat it. Every so often, I'll have a relentless craving for fried chicken, but once it's satisfied, I hate chicken again. I guess you can't really take all of the negro out of the girl.
19. If I ever get married, I want it to be to a stand-up comic. I like dudes that make me laugh, I like stand-up comedy. Makes sense. I like music too, though. Maybe a dude in a funny band. See, then they'd go on tour, and not be around to annoy me so much.
20. Sometimes I wish that if I had children, one of them would be a midget.
1. I prefer to brush my teeth in the shower.
2. My brother and I are very close. Most everyone has commented on it, I guess it's strange for siblings to get along so well. But, he's the one person who's seen me at my best, and at my worst and never judged me.
3. I laugh every time someone sneezes. Especially if it's the first time I've heard them sneeze.
4. I like sneezing myself. A lot. Sometimes I wish I did it more often. Once, I had a sneeze stuck, I couldn't sneeze it out. My brother suggested I snort some pepper. I did. And I sneezed and sneezed and we laughed like two idiots.
5. When I eat raisins or grapes, I usually tell someone, "You know, grapes (or raisins) are nature's candy?
6. I am hopelessly addicted to tattoos. I have one that needs to be finished, others to cover, and ideas for many more. But, I'm penniless right now. I have to get my fix by watching shows like Miami Ink, and Inked. Hearing the tattoo machines makes me twitchy. Sometimes, I go to the parlor, just so I can smell it, and hear the machines go.
7. I love the smell of used bookstores. First thing I do is walk inside, close my eyes and take a deep breath.
8. Ever since stumbling upon grouphug.us a couple years ago, I've been unable to share candy or chips from a communal bowl. Just watching people go nuts over a bowl of m&ms and stick their grubby mitts in there makes me shudder.
9. When I was a kid, I was terrified of the Yodeller on the Price is Right and of those aliens on Sesame Street.
10. When I was a kid, and I'd be scared to go to sleep, or wake up from a nightmare, I used to think about Strawberry Shortcake in the forest with her friends until I fell asleep again. I tried this the other day, and it still works!
11. After I watched the movie Kalifornia, I let myself just feel the wind, and I love it. When it's windy out, I'm the freakshow with my arms spread and my eyes closed and a shit-eating grin on my face.
12. I rescue most bugs and take them outside. Especially spiders. A centipede will have me standing on a chair, screaming like a madwoman.
13. Really, my main motivation in life is finding shit that makes me laugh. I laugh all the time. Pretty much any situation can be funny if you look at it right.
14. Trent Reznor is a genius, and he always knows just how to sing exactly what I'm feeling.
15. I've never been arrested or in any real trouble. Once, in middle school, I was hanging out with the bad kids and we got caught skipping. The 4 or 5 of us went to the principal's office. One by one, the kids in front of me were getting suspended. I was so nervously excited to get in trouble and be suspended. I was the last one, and they said they were going to let me off with a warning since I was such a good student otherwise. I was disappointed.
16. Sometimes, I wish I could be religious and believe in god. It seems like it makes life a lot easier.
17. I wanted to be a kleptomanic when I was a kid. I think I saw something on TV about it. Anyway, I'd steal stupid shit whenever we went to a store. Like, those little puffballs from craft stores and candy. I didn't really see the point, and I stopped.
18. I don't like chicken. I'm happy that I'm by myself now, and don't ever have to eat it. Every so often, I'll have a relentless craving for fried chicken, but once it's satisfied, I hate chicken again. I guess you can't really take all of the negro out of the girl.
19. If I ever get married, I want it to be to a stand-up comic. I like dudes that make me laugh, I like stand-up comedy. Makes sense. I like music too, though. Maybe a dude in a funny band. See, then they'd go on tour, and not be around to annoy me so much.
20. Sometimes I wish that if I had children, one of them would be a midget.
// posted by jess @ 6:03 PM 
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Yea! Then you'll be the ultimate! You're in a band (bass players are the sexiest), and a stand up comic??
Do you mind midget children?
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Do you mind midget children?
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